Boss Unknown
circulated 8 Nov 1972 by OECA employees
Dear Employee:
The attendance record of this department is a disgrace to our gracious Benefactor who, at your request, has given you your job. Due to lack of consideration for your job with so fine an Employer, as shown by such frequent absenteeism, it has become necessary for us to revise some of our policies. The following changes are in effect as of November 19, 1970:- Sickness
- No excuse -- we will no longer accept your doctor's statement as proof, as we believe that if you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.
- Leave of absence (for operation)
- We are no longer allowing this practice; we wish to discourage any thought that you may need an operation, as we believe as long as you are an Employee here, you will need all of whatever you have and should not consider having anything removed. We hired you as you are, and to have anything removed, would certainly make you less than we bargained for. If you do have anything removed, your salary will be adjusted accordingly.
- Death (your own)
- This will be accepted as an excuse but we would like two weeks notice -- as we feel it is your duty to teach someone else your job.
- Coffee Break
- Too much time is being spent in this Coffee Room. Rather than close up entirely, Coffee Breaks will be reduced to five minutes. To compensate, 2 sticks of Juicy Fruit Gum will be issued you daily in order to S-T-R-E-T-C-H your Coffee Break . Also, too much time is being spent in the restroom. Those names beginning with "A" will go from 8:30 to 8:45, those with "B" from 8:45 to 9:00 and so forth. If you are unable to go at this time, you will have to wait until the next day when your turn comes again.
We expect your full co-operation in this matter.
Yours truly,
Your Boss
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